3 Ways to Seize Creative Control Over Your Life

5 Daily Habits that work for me.png

‘Creative Control’ in the artistic world is usually defined as someone who has “the authority to make decisions in the context of a creative project.” In the music world, it can be a decided reason to stay indie rather than signing to a major label. It means YOU get to call the shots on the direction and style of your work and how the finished product turns out.   

When you think of your life as a work of art (as I believe it is), then it becomes vital to determine who is holding the creative control. This is the person who will determine the final outcome, after all. 

Often, we give our creative control away.

We let our need to please others dictate the choices that we make. We have the role, we have the power but we convince ourselves that we aren’t ‘good enough’ in some way. The role still must be filled, so we begin either consciously or unconsciously trying to fill it. 

Perhaps you look to that one instagram girl who has all the followers and ‘perfect’ photographic feed. Maybe you look to your friends because you deeply desire a feeling of belonging. Maybe you look to a mentor or a top dog in your industry because they MUST be doing something right. They all seem to know what they are doing. They all seem happier than you feel. 


The truth is external resources and trust-worthy people can be valuable assets in your decision making and in your life. But they cannot transform your life into the true masterpiece that it could be. 

Only YOU hold that paint brush. 


But that’s the good news. When you know that life can be crafted like a work of art and you just happen to be an artist, you stop side-stepping the real work. You stop waiting on others. You own your story and decide to make it a page turner.


How you can seize creative control: 


Claim your role. 

You’ve already got the job. The truth is, the role is already yours. You can choose to show up or not but it is already your job for as long as you are here on Earth. You might as well enjoy the benefits, right?

If this is a difficult step for you, lean into your creativity. You can even write yourself an acceptance letter from the universe welcoming you on board as the creative director of your life. It may sound cheesy, but the more you ways you send your mind this message, the more your start to believe it and step up to the task at hand. 


Claim your narrative. 

What is your vision? What do you truly want for for your life as a whole? How do you want to feel along the way? Taking the time to sit with your vision will help you understand where you should point your arrow. 

Our time is limited. We can’t act on every story that we may want to explore or tell in our life. So you must prioritize. What is the MOST important vision you hold? Journal, create a vision board, or just meditate on your answer. 


Claim your purpose. 

Steve Jobs once said, “Life can be so much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call 'life' was made up by people who were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use.”

As artists in the field of life, we have to continue our work. We have choose to matter. We must choose to create meaning. Life is what you make it mean. No palm reader, astrological chart, or powerful person can give you any more meaning than you can give yourself.

Our entire system of life was made up by people. You are a person. And further more, if you have already done step one, you are a creative director at that! It’s time to act like it, gem!

What to Do When People Steal Your Creative Ideas

5 Daily Habits that work for me.png

Last week, I went through a tough experience. I had not one - but TWO of my ideas stolen. Someone took the time to copy down what I originally crafted and pass it off as their own. I was just minding my business and BAM, cue Twilight zone music and my jaw hitting the floor. 


* Disclaimer * I’m not qualified to advise you directly on how to legally handle copyright issues, etc. That is, rightfully, a job reserved for well-trained attorneys that specialize in that field. Go to the pro’s, people! I never wish to misguide another creative on the actions they should take when this happens to them.

But there is another side to this experience that I would like to address for my fellow creatives. Going through something like this can derail your mindset and your inner world, if you let it. Personally, it took me a day of venting and writing through to process what I was feeling. I finally landed on a healthy way of reframing the situation. 


As a lifelong songwriter, I think very highly of original, heartfelt work. I take risks to say what I need to say. I focus on the process, not the result or reaction. I LIVE for those moments where I’m expressing my truth.  


When I see others plagiarizing or stealing ideas, it honestly makes me sad. Because they are focused on the OUTCOME and the perceived gain, rather than tapping into the magic of their own inner voice. 

And the cold, hard truth?

You are not guaranteed the same results. The reason that idea worked for somebody else is because they tapped into something real and raw that shot to the core of who they are. 

Have you ever seen that remarkable video of Maggie Rogers?

You know, the one that went that went viral and jumpstarted her music career…

Pharrell Williams, a Grammy winning producer and artist, visibly falls in love with her music. But instead of turning to the class and recommending that they all mimic Maggie’s beautiful sound….

Instead, he says something profound. 

“I want all of you guys to know that you possess the ability to do that for yourself.

You have to be willing…” 

He goes on to talk about how they can create something unique that has never been done before…they just have to be willing to go there. 

That’s my strong belief as well. 


So yeah, it was frustrating to see someone using something I poured my HEART into. But it made me feel much worse for them. They are missing out on their OWN magic - magic that we each possess inside of us.

There’s no need to search any further for your own magic than your inner self.


My guide for processing…


Feel Your Emotions: 

I CRIED. No BS, here. It hurts to feel taken from and it hurts to see people not play fair. It hurts to feel like they can gain from something that was your way of creating meaning and purpose. Crying physically releases the emotion which gives you a chance to move on. 


Talk about your feelings: 

I spoke to my fiancé about my feelings and expressed my hurt and pain. My feelings deserved to be acknowledged and validated, even though I knew I didn’t want to stay stuck there. 


Re-claim your Magic: 

I leaned in EVEN CLOSER to my own vision and magic. I pulled up a blank document on my laptop and started typing out my vision moving forward. This space CANNOT be taken from us no matter what. As creatives, we always have the ability to connect to our inner spark. This is your magic - that special something that only you can bring your work. 


Healthy Mindset: 

I shifted my mindset and reminded myself of an important truth…They can steal the song, but not the songwriter. They can steal the photo, but not the photographer. They can steal the vision, but NOT the visionary. 



You DESERVE all of the beautiful magic inside of you my gems. 


Lean into it and shine on…


I empower creative women to value themselves, connect with their inner wisdom & express their creativity, raw & real. I would love to help you lean into your magic:

External seeking = Internal loss

5 Daily Habits that work for me.png

Guest Post by Tracey Gillis-Sinclair of Wisdom to Wellness


My Why?

The new millennium gifted me with a child… a beautiful baby boy, it was a time, that society told me it should be a heart opening time, to be honest, those first few months left me feeling inadequate, lost and confused.

Who am I now? How do I protect this precious child to survive in the world + the weight I felt in the moments where I was desperate for freedom.

The chemical connection was strong; but just as strong were the demands I had placed upon myself as a woman and mother. We needed to buy a home, that I should have lost all of my baby weight that the women in those magazines I had a few minutes to view every now and then, had; so why was it so difficult for me? There must be something fundamentally wrong with me!

It took me a few months for this cloud of expectation to drop and I was able to feel a real connection with my precious baby boy. Ohhh how it has taken me a long time for the weight of this guilt to release its grip on me. 

6 years later we were gifted with a precious daughter and a beautiful surprise 3 years later in another divine daughter.

I had always had a feeling that I was drawn to this work, but my self talk combined with the need I had to be loved + seen as worthy kept me in the guilt, not enough. I was lonely and my feminine spirit was almost extinct. This very reality was centered around abandonment issues, I had of not being good enough.

unnamed.png

I had these fears that were causing me to panic, these fears centered around acceptance, worth, love + expression and this is exactly what led me to the concept of being with the discomfort. I had to try something different to the resistance I had spent many of my vital years pursuing.

My example of womanhood was to put everyone else’s needs before my own, that in order for me to be happy it was vital that others were to be happy first.

Boundaries were this strange feeling I got when someone did something I didn’t particularly like or approve of, but I had no idea or vocabulary on what this was. So I figured out the best way to handle these feelings was to minimize my exposure to them or to allow the other person to do what they wanted. This left me confused, alone and feeling shattered.

At the age of 35, I was shaken awake, and it is literally what it felt like! This moment was the beginning of my journey home, the pure spirit I was as a newborn. 

I had to ‘be with’ these feelings that had everything to do with not being with them.

I had to learn what value there was in taking a step inward + allowing the truth of me, the space to be witnessed.

I began to have greater visibility of who I was and how I needed to be in the world. It was real, authentic, and expressive. The logic mind does not understand this the ways of the heart and we have to quiet the mind. 

My Tips to quiet the mind:

  • Be in nature – allow your essence to have a space in our life. Connect with the aspect of you that thrives on being

  • Be curious about what is in the mind – being curious, is about leaning gently into those thoughts you are having. What are they about, when did they begin, what was happening at the time.

  • Explore through journal, dance, art – expressing ourselves in any way we can , benefits us, it allows our emotions the space to move, it brings joy, it reminds our beautiful, plastic brains that there is another way. 


Daring to be with that which is not comfortable, what I know for sure is that the more we push down what is true for us, the more we push down our joy, sadness, guilt, grief our curiosity and keep them small for what we believe to be a more comfortable state for us to be in, we are just dimming our own light. We are keeping ourselves small. Because what I know to be true is that these emotions are here as an expression of who we really are and only when we judge them do the limit us.


As a life journey coach and Kinesiologist, my own experiences of stuffing my emotions down and keeping them small. I learnt that this is where the gold is, the gold lies within the exploration of what it is we are trying to keep small. When we understand what we are trying to keep small, we are gifted with a beautiful opportunity to understand ourselves a little better. And when we understand ourselves better, we bring an awareness in that we simply cant ignore.


Before I woke up, I would say to our extremely anxious son, ‘oh that wont happen, there is no need to worry about that, I promise you that wont be your reality, try not to think about it’. Was the very moment I learned the skill of learning to be with and get curious about this very discomfort. This moment changed my life completely. 

For those of you who know me, know that small talk or top level conversation is something Im not very strong with; these things I struggle with. I am all about depth; I am all about nurturing these emotions that keep us small. What I know to be true is that when we allow our feelings space we give ourselves a beautiful opportunity to discover something really important about ourselves.